Comparing Myself

When I was a little kid, I was really curious.I was questioning why I existed with my small brain and I had no answer.I still don't have an answer. 

I want to compare my childhood and today in this blog.

I was very brave when I was kid. But these days I'm afraid of many things.

I can't tell my future dreams to anyone. I guess it could be the most impacting my life. But i realized why. 
No one I told my dream to believed me. This is quite traumatic for a small child. Even my family doesn't know my dreams because of these events. 

I don't have a method to get rid of it unfortunately.😀

When i was a kid i could ask anything. Even back then, my questions were strange for people. But nowadays, when I ask a question about God, about the universe, they immediately say "tövbe tövbe". Questioning isn't that bad.

I felt really free in those days. I feel like this body doesn't belong to me.It all sounds so ridiculous. Nothing I do makes any sense. Everything is lost in space and emptiness. Our 80 years are actually empty. It's like the world revolves around us. People are really egotistical. We don't know anything about the universe.
Sometimes I exaggerate...

When I was a kid, I was me. Now, I'm not me. Well, who am i? I know who I was back then. I don't know now. What do I like, what makes me happy, what makes me sad, who is the real me if i'm not real, what if i only exist in dreams, am I this person, what kind of person am I, who do I look like, what do I look like, why am I here?..

I have only one answer: I don't know.This is how philosophy was found. I like philosophy. But philosophy found no answer to that little kid's questions or mine.

But philosophy is still good. 

Stay happy. If it is possible...

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